You say "Tomato"... I say "Tomato Tomato Tomato Tomato Tomato"
Greatest Blog Ever
Twas a dark and eerie night in Erie, Illinois. Craig and Jay were having a grand time reuniting for one night, as Jay travelled cross-country via various interstates for his employer, Interstates. Jay had picked a crazed hitch-hiker, who was missing a tooth and claiming to be Jay's father, Eric.
It was difficult to hear anything other than the sound of the movie "Chicken Run", and the maniacal cackling of 'Eric' after every line of the movie. But as Craig and Jay were discussing something really clever and intelligent, and environmentally beneficial, they heard something. It was quite quiet at first, but it was definitely there. They looked at the miniature forest that Craig planted on his pool table, and they saw a small journeyman emerge from the right corner pocket. Quietly, they observed him. Luckily Jay had a video camera handy.
This is what they observed.
It has been nearly nine months since we last blogged together. If you can recall correctly, or retain usage of your scrolling finger, you will remember that our last blog together had a sexual under/overtone. It was a very fertile evening, one that we shall not soon forget. After spellchecking one another and admiring each other’s grammar in great detail, we soon departed ways. Little did we know, a little fetal concept was conceived deep in the womb of our brains. During the 9 month gestation period that followed, our brains grew in terrible proportions with the blognancy. We had sudden cravings for knowledge of weird combinations; we devoured poetry dipped in differential equations, philosophical linear systems, and agricultural economics smothered in the droppings of hyper psychologists. In the mornings we awoke with terrible sickness, spewing garbage ideas such as Racial Profiles, Lost Translations, Garden Woes, Great F-ing Weekends, and Danis. Our apologies to those who got spewed on. After the first trimester, our typing fingers began to swell with anticipation of the milky ideas to come. Soon after, we were feeling the ideas kick around in each others’ heads. We began to think up headings for this blog, but we wanted the theme to be a surprise, so we had to come up with two titles.
Two nights ago we peed our pants with excitement, and we knew that the little wonder was on its way. We rushed to the computer lab quick as the dickens! “It’s gonna be great, that’s it, breathe, breathe!” we cried to each other. The computer was slow in starting up. We thought about overclocking the computer to ease the process, but then realized we wanted to experience the natural miracle of our blog. It was a painful, yet joyous experience.
We asked the webmaster what theme it was, and he said, “it’s a beautiful five paragraph, 28 sentence long baby boy!” We didn’t really know what he was talking about, but we cried with joy at the sight of our newborn blog. Once we were done typing, we spanked the post button at the bottom of the page, and the blog cried out into cyberspace. We were ready to disconnect the ethernet cord!
We wrapped it in swaddling navy-green and orange eye of the liger background, and held it on our monitor for a few moments. We milked the blogging concept for all it was worth, long into the night. It was quite draining. In the morning, we were allowed to take it back to our homepage. It shit all over other bloggers pages, desperate for attention.
We plan to nurture this blog and raise it properly to someday make a real domain name for himself and find his place in the world (wide web).
I thought we had to start paddling from land
It was too difficult on land, so we just carried it to the water
Me, and the thousands of cheering fans
I also did a marathon with some friends from work. We were a 5-man relay team. Everyone did about 5 or 6 miles of the marathon, except me, I chose to do the 3.2 mile leg of the race, which, in my opinion, is the most difficult, but no one else agreed with me.
It took us a while to decide on a team name. We were torn between a few: Flat-arch-enemies, The Thigh Masters, The Golden Calves, Stridin' Dirty, Victorious Secret, and The PaceMakers.
We are all focused before the race, except me, I was looking at a squirrel.
Stridin' Dirty
Butt Shot
Greetings,
The garden has been flourishing as of late. My radishes came in a few weeks ago, unfortunately i harvested them too late, and they were a bit woody. The cilantro was great, but now is past its prime, which is unfortunate, because i wanted to use it in the mass quantities of salsa that i plan to make once the tomatoes mature a little more. Potatoes were doing good until a recent onslaught of Japanese beatles scourged their leaves.
The past F-ing weekend was wonderful, I fully enjoyed Friday, Flag Day, and Fathers Day.
Oooooohhhhh. Now. Tonight we’re gonna make blog. And you know how I know? Because it’s Sunday. And Sunday night is the night that we usually make blog. Friday night is my turn to cook. Saturrday night we go and visit our mothers. But Sunday night we make our sweet weekly blog entry. It’s when everything is just right. There’s nothing good on TV. We haven’t had our after work social sports team practice so we’re not too tired.